Crazy cut.

One of my biggest fears (for myself and my loved ones) is the dreaded "slicing a bagel in half and cutting your finger" scenario. Of course, after watching (and yelling at) my little brother unsafely cut his bagel while grasping it in his hand, I slice my thumb doing it the "safe way" (cutting it on a plate). *In my defense, my mom happened to cough really loudly while I was cutting my Jalapeno Cheddar bagel. THANKS, MOM!

So, while I scowled at my bagel as it toasted, I had to stop the bleeding.The gash was about an inch long, but not too deep.  Surprisingly, this cut was a bit of a gusher and it took a few mummy-worthy twirls of gauze to get the bleeding to slow.

The blood-soaked bandage was enough to call for drastic measures: super glue. 

Yup, this stuff was supposedly used during the Vietnam War and a lot of athletes use it in it's antibacterial for-medical-use form, but all we had was good ol' crazy super glue. 

And it worked. I heard how cyanoacrylate could be used in a pinch and it certainly did the trick. Literally, 5 seconds after it was applied, the bleeding pretty much stopped.

By all means, do not do this if you can stop the bleeding from small cuts in more traditional ways. Heck, get stitches if you really need to. But it is always a good option to have around just in case you cannot get to the doctor.

I'm sure a couple of guys would agree with me:

 

GeekOmnivore SCORE: 

(for crazy glue solution: SUPERsticky! / for bagel: meh, wasn't worth it.)

*images and video sourced from around the Web. Thank you, Internet! Thank you, Richard Dean Anderson!...and Will Forte....and glue.*